Confessions of a Missionary Mama....

So, Life is a bit different being back in the good 'ole US of A.
This week, we are in Colorado Springs......

                                                                     (Khloe Purple, 4 months old)

Back now since Christmas....I am convinced that we are doing what we are susposed to be doing. Meeting with supporters and friends this week has been OUTSTANDING! I had Pork tenderloin today (yum) with tomatoes, basil and cheese, and creme puffs with chocolate and raspberries.  Thanks Johnson Fam. 

You guys are beautiful. 

Friday night we hooked up with friends from New Life (well, everyone we have reconnected with out side of the campus is from New Life...) and she, the lovely Lisa C., cooked a thanksgiving style meal and invited some amazing close friends of hers.

BLESSED are we.

Today, at church while checking in the girls an aquaintance gave Dusty 4 Target gift cards? Huh? Really? We are so totally in God's will right now!!! Oh, my goodness, I almost forgot the trip to Texas T-Bone last night with some of our dear friends Stacy and Alan, they treated us to STEAK! HaHa.  Oh, and the free tank of gas too.

All of this exactly when we needed it.  We have had 10 bucks for 5 days and never been hungry, with out gas or felt 'broke'. 

 

          (getting our Dog park on!  Colorado-Mountain desert style)

MY STORY, GOD's GLORY

I have been questioning some whether or not this is right, you know...not "suffering for JC" in a foriegn counrty and all. Like it's "suffering" doing exactly what you are created for anyway....

Living a tripple life is how it feels today. 

 I am Heather of Kansas City, Heather of Colorado and Heather of Asia. 

These 3 me's have purpose......I want to me the best me possible.

I am so thankful for my fam and that God brought us Khloe to take the edge off of my 'self discovery' lessons. 

Going to the dog park ministers to me. 
The fresh air, exercize and eyes lifted off of the tasks at hand. 

I have to come to terms with the fact that I can act like an American here, and do American housewife things.  Like take my girls' and dog to the dog park.  And it's not a waste of time.  It's not time lost, and I am still in God's will even here....

               (Khloe with a pack of Huskies)

I think I have been a bit scared to be me since being back.  The me I used to be.  Do I even remember that girl?  Before the leap of faith it took to get the tattoo on my wrist the week before our training began.  Can I still be her?  Am I still her?  Do I even like her?  Is she worthy of this call? 

(Pause for some tears, the good kind.) 

Father, thank you covering me with your mercy.  For taking me to the place where your beauty shows.

Where I can hear from you and you can minister to my weary soul.

I see you in my brother and sisters faces, I see you now, as I process these feelings and I saw you today when I was trying to be mad at Dusty at church.  But then he showed me the 4 gift cards and I thought of how your good provision is never to late. 

 I needed razors bad, no need to elaborate.

I am the best me, the old the new, the good, bad and and the ugly!

Can I hack it though.....

 Will I be able to find back yard fun for the girls' like they used to have?

 When My family is at the lake house and we are in Asia, will they miss us? 

 Will I find matching Easter outfits in Asia?

Will Amber remember her life as a Kansas City kid playing in the fountains downtown?

 Will Ava find neighbor kids to hang out with?  To explore with, to laugh with?

 Will they remember how good of a boat driver I was?  I used to pull their daddy on the wakeboard while making sure they both stayed in the boat, I often held a crying baby as I drove that sparkly blue ski boat. 

 Will I be able to keep them physicaly active?  Will they be able to find sport teams to participate in?

NO, but He can-He can hack it!

Our Father loves them more than I ever could. 
I feel the need to recreate the "good life" we had when I know, and

live out

 his perfect provision  and plan every day.  

What will life look like this next summer, I wonder. 

What will I do with myself if there is no t-ball,

no lazy days on a lake somewhere in Kansas. 

What will we do on Memorial day?  The 4th of July? 

(These are holidays not celebrated in Asia, in case anybody was wondering)

 Father, I give these memories to you like fruits of the soil, an offering to the LORD. 

Help me find peace in knowing the memories that will be created will not out shine these times.  That they will add to them. You took our lake in Kansas and replaced it with the Agean Sea.  I trust you to take these memories and make something beautiful out of them. 

Something ever lasting.